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Showing posts from May, 2016

How's it going?

I sing "Dixie" to my son before he goes to bed. This is something I have done since he was mere weeks old. Why I do this, I do not know. But, I do- and we like my off-key rendition that is quietly whispered into his ear as the sun sets on another day. It's a calm moment after a hectic afternoon and before the "Hail Mary" prayer. Kisses on the head and into bed with a cup of milk and a hand-knitted blanket from a friend.
We buried our nephew last week. It was a long week on my in-laws farm with information and heresy slowly making its way into our bubble, popping our tranquility and grief with both fact and fiction.
How's it going? -- It's the question everyone asks. What they are really wanting to know is...
How do you grieve the death of a young man, three friends and his girlfriend when he was murdered and burned by another? How do you handle it?  
Well, quite simply-- you don't.
Murder-- That's a word that doesn't roll off the tongue without a…

Little Man

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His heart was big.
The last time I saw him, his hair was long and the beard was scraggly. But, he was making plans.
He had a girlfriend and she had dimples. Precious dimples and a beautiful smile.

His ability to make conversation was uncanny- I had seen it once before, in my own brother. Jonathan had the personality that was too big to be encapsulated in a small body.
He wasn't small.
"Little Man" was big; bigger than life, it seemed.


I didn't grow up with him. I didn't always understand him. But, I loved talking to him on the front porch during family gatherings. He would sneak off and I knew where to find him. We would talk about his life and his plans. We would talk about his summers, his vacations, his conversations he had with his friends. Sometimes, we would talk about his girlfriends.

He would entertain me. He would make me laugh. Oh, how he could make me laugh.

The running conversation was the topic of food-- we both loved food. The question was, "If…