Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Wearing the Rally Cap

In all honesty, today has not been that much better than yesterday.
A trip to Goodwill produced no great finds (we po' but we proud) in the search for a side table.
I spilled the box of nails at the very scary Home Depot after I paid for the 300 suckers.
LMC fell out screaming and crying in the car again.
I yelled at her. I hate yelling at her. I don't want to be a parent who can't control her temper. That's not who I want to be.

But, the curtains have been hung. I am almost halfway through that project.  I sat outside the car while she screamed bloody murder and played scrabble on my phone. I swept the nails that I could and ignored the Spanish speaking illegal immigrants leering my way and asking if I needed asistencia with my proyecto. Seriously, guys? Seriously?
NO.

But, I have a new attitude today- and I finally got a shower, which is always a step in the right direction.

Like I said, I yelled at LMC. But, after calming down I explained to her why I yelled.

She whined. Whining gets under my skin like nobody's business. I loathe whiny children. Execrate. They kill me and I have minimal patience for it. Have I painted the picture clear enough yet? She has been whining an incessant amount since we moved and I get it-- it's a new place & there is some acclimation that needs to be achieved. So, I take a deep breath and walk away before I contemplate yelling at her a second time.

The whining continues. It digs a little deeper under my skin. I start hanging pictures because, MAN does it feel good to put a hammer to a nail and pound the stew out of it. She continues.

I put her in the crib and walk away.

Thank GAWD that we reassembled the crib. I go back to hammering.

[longer than I should admit to time frame later] she says, "Ma-MEE! I no whine. I calm down. I love you! Out please?" I smile and she helps me hang her curtains.

She planted another daisy outside of her garden. Toddlers are gross. Maybe motherhood is gross, too.

She kisses my nose. I smile.

I contemplate eating bonbons and remember that bathing suit season is around the corner.

The chicken that was to be tonight's first home cooked dinner in over a week will sit in the refrigerator as Husband is on call again. Another sandwich.

Maybe it's the weather. Maybe it's just a new day. But, these days are trying and I am trying to get through them. Some days are better than others, but all days here are better than the alternative. One day at a time and we are moving forward. Because, really, there is no rewind button around here.

Come on 5 o'clock! Mommy is counting down!

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