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Showing posts from April, 2009

Moving a Million Hearts in Mono

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I have been asked, on several occasions, within the last two weeks, "How are you feeling?"

Six weeks ago, I would have lied and said, "You know... pregnant. Really though, I feel fine.".

Or, to those a little closer to me, I would have said, "You know... like most things in life, peaks and valleys."

Or, to Husband, grumpy and tired I would look at him when we crawled under the covers at the end of a quiet day and just whisper, "I don't feel good" and pretend that I did not want to cry.

Ask me today. Go on, ask. I dare you.

"Rachel, how are you feeling?"

I feel fine. She's in love with me and I feel fine.

I have a new lease on life. I have a new lease on pregnancy. Give me what ya got-- BRING IT. I might cry (shocker), but I can take it.

Continually, I am humbled and amazed by pregnancy and what a blessing gd-GD has been to both the Cagles. My last visit, two weeks ago, showed that my short frame has fleshed out (I love that expression)…

Little Lessons in Love

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What a lovely day! Mama's girlfriends hosted a lovely shower for Eileen yesterday afternoon and I was positively showered with love and attention from everyone. These women watched me grow up and were so excited to take part in this special event. Mom had a little trick up her sleeve- one that I could not believe and one that I am so humbled to have received.
At 33 weeks, Eileen makes it her goal in life to find both my bladder and my right lung with her hands and feet and squeeeeezzzeeeee tightly. She weighs in at just over four pounds and is on track to be seven pounds... ouch. If you were to keep an eyeball on my stomach, you would see her swish this way and that. Husband and I are already making plans to take her on her first beach trip to St. George Island in November for her to play in the biggest sandbox and swim in the salty water. But, with plans and babies... if you want to make God laugh, make a plan.
Back to mom's present... beautiful. Just beautiful. No other word f…

My Brave Front.

I can be so bold sometimes. So bold in the face of things I do not know or understand. Pretending. That is how I get through some things.

I can pretend all day long I understand diabetes. And I know a lot- a lot more than I did three weeks ago- but I still do not know so much.

I know that people still do not understand that the only way I am able to control this, and help keep Eileen is 100% through my diet. No cheating. Cheating only hurts her.

I know that I am healthier for having been diagnosed and that by sticking to my diet and ignoring chocolate chip cookies, cheese dip, and Cheerios- I am making the last 7 weeks, the hardest 7 weeks of maintaining insulin resistance, better.

I know that I can make shrimp 10 different ways and it tastes different and delicious each time. With zero carbs.

I know I have to pack 9 cheese soy cracker cakes for a side to my sandwich for lunch wherever I go or Lay's potato chips will be harder to turn down.

Today though, I learned something new. I have …

The Greatest of Them All.

British golf writer, Pat Ward-Thomas, used those words, "The Greatest of them all," in reference to the great Bobby Jones back in December, 1971 when he finally passed away after a long hard battle.

This week is one of the greatest weeks we, as Augustans, experience. We are hosts and hostesses to the whole world. For four brief days we stand at attention and welcome fellow patrons into our lives, our homes, and our fair town for what has been dubbed by those that whisper into microphones "a tradition like no other."

Welcome to my world. Welcome to my home.

The Greatest of them all. This time of year always makes me think of my sweet Aunt Helen. Especially now. Aunt Helen died last Easter & I miss her so much today. I would have loved to tell her that I was pregnant with her great-great niece, named for her favorite brother's youngest daughter. Aunt Helen was the greatest of them all.

In my heart, I know there are poignant words she would have spoken to me in h…

The Best of a Bad Situation.

It’s been a tough go at the last 2 weeks. There’s been blood sugar to learn about, cookbooks to stick my nose in, and lots and lots of time on the internet finding out what my carb count will be if I eat _______. But after the tears and the fear of what is happening to my body and the growing one inside of me, something important happened. I got over it.

So, my detailed excel sheet tracks everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) down to the 2 tbsp. of chocolate ice cream I had last night when we got back from “baby birthing” class. Blood sugar, exercise, carbs, food, you name it… it’s on there. And my little “trigger pack” is discreet & fits in my purse, or on my desk, or in my car, or anywhere I need it to- and it only takes about 25 seconds from soup to nuts to test my blood sugar and write it down.

The last two weeks have been a big change in our pregnancy.

Bull.

Horns.

Me.

Today though, I woke up with no knowledge of how big the change in my pregnancy actually was. We had an appointment w…